That woman. You know who I mean. She does it all. Her house is immaculate, her children are always impeccably dressed and are unnaturally well-behaved. She is always put together, complete with perfect makeup and hair, every time she steps out of the house. She participates in every church/school/community/volunteer function, and bakes the most amazing desserts (of course, as if we could expect any less?) to bring to her kids' bake sales. We all know this woman. She is Super Mom. "How does she DO it?" we marvel. And, let's be honest here, we completely hate her - and yet simultaneously (and sometimes begrudgingly) we admire her and wish we could BE her.
How can we, mere mortal moms, ever hope to compete with the Super Moms of the world? Well, there is a ray of hope for us all!
First of all, these women, dazzling as they may seem, are not perfect. They struggle with things the same as you and me. In fact, their struggles may be even more difficult, because they often feel driven to maintain an image of perfection, and are terrified of letting anyone see them with their walls down. Or, they could be a mom who struggles with some sort of a disorder that will not allow her to stop cleaning and stop obsessing over these things. Even worse are the moms who care about maintaining outward appearances of perfection, because they are desperate to keep the real world from knowing the reality of their depression, anxiety, failing marriage, or other such personal horrors.
I have had the opportunity more than once to see behind the mask of a Super Mom, and inside is a real woman, with real problems, just like you and me. There is always more to the story that we don't know. No one is perfect, and it does no good to use others as a standard of judging our own self worth. We all have our struggles in life; you never know what kind of fears and insecurities are in the heart of that woman we assume can do it all.
So, the wonderful news I have to share with you is this: YOU ALREADY ARE SUPER MOM! You love your children, and you would do anything to help them, and see them grow into happy, healthy members of society. Every day you work hard at meeting their needs. You feed them, clothe them, hug and kiss them, help then with their homework, kiss their booboos, take them to the doctor and nurse them back to health when they are sick... the list could go on and on about the things you do for your children. You are a Super Mom simply because of your love for you children. God, with His all-knowing power, decided that YOU are the best possible mother for your children, and He gave those children to you for you to raise in a way that only you can. You already are Super Mom. Just keep reminding yourself of that!
The fact of the matter is, no one person can do it all, all of the time. As mothers, we have got to let go of the Super Mom complex! We all would be so much better off if we do. Not only would we be happier mothers once we have more realistic expectations for ourselves, but we would be less judgmental of other moms as well. If we could keep in mind that we all struggle with motherhood in some way, shape or form, and make up our minds to encourage and uplift fellow moms instead of casting judgement on them for how well or poorly we think they are performing their jobs, then this world would such a better place, and we could nearly do away with the "mommy wars" we see all the time.
In the next few days, I will be posting some of my tips for staying on top of the seemingly endless tasks we have to perform on a daily basis. Until then, keep reminding yourself this: God gave you to your children because He knows that you are exactly what they need. You love your kids, and would do anything for them. You are a great mom. You are a Super Mom.
God bless you and keep you!
Your Sister in Christ,
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